4.50 am
Wide awake blinded by this screen.

Everything is sencitive.

My nerves on fire.


Eyes can baerly see.
So so sencitive.


Evrything i put to my mouth tastes like gandys flip flop.
Tastes foul.

Quick get to the loo.
Niagra falls is on its way.


Shite flooding from him.
LIke a man slashed across the throut.


Teeth feel furry.
Mouth tastes shite.

take the blanket off .
Its to hot,hotter than the sun glaring at me from the corner of my living room.

Blanket back please ime freezing now.

The sun in one corner.
The north pole in the other.

Ime trapped, cornerd myself.

I grin and baer this constant change of weather within myself.


So tired but no not for you no sleep.
Just adds to this torture.

The darkness is faiding, out side.

But still the night within clings on like its life depends on it.

I sit lean back and sigh.

Sick of being sick.

Get up to make some tea nearly collapse.

Sod the tea crash on the sette.

mouth as dry as a camalels c u next tuesday.

But dont want to move just lay down and suffer.

Minds saying your the only fool feeling this .

But i know ime not alone.

sorry will finish this later feeel shite,gonna lay down.

HAPPY XMAS

Hope evry one has a great xmas and a wonderful new year.


Dont forget to get pissed and put 8 stone on.

Ps thanks to every one who has checked my site out thank you once againe.

Life is a struggle and for those who feel lonely or depressed always remember your not alone and that together we stand 12 feet tall.

Its  a hard life, but we dont give in.


hard life.
Dont know where to begin.

Tuff life we keep on marching.

We are soldiers.

SAS of the feeling world of anxiety.depression,lonlyness.

What ever we feel keep going.

We may feel such a way but we never give in.

 Never give up.

May think we are going insane, dont worry i was insane from the age of 8.

Nothing wrong in any way we feel. its how we act that counts.

I have made a promise that after this new year.

I will drink and take more drugs.

No seriously after the new year.

I will cofront my demons and gaine control of my life.

No more suppresing uncomfortable feelings.

No more.

No .

MORNING WAKEY WAKEY

Monday morning.

please let me know why i hate monday mornings.

And every morning.

 Or lets call it mourning.

AS ITS WAKE UP TIME, PLEASE ANOTHER  HOUR IN THE PIT.

And i feel like shit.

I awake shivering, cold sweats,

Down my hall way brush my teeth.

Doing all i can not to rech or vomit as i brush the teeth

Stomach in nots of aggonising paine.


The sweat is the sweat of a man possesed.


It burns this sweat and leaves me cold.

Just as the holy water burns the victim of a child possesed by satan .

An exosition.

MAY be ime possed.

I do all ican to tame the beast with in me.


But this animal is so so powerful.


It strips me of everything i love in life, (which isnt alot)


Got no morals they faided out years ago.


got no motavation, just want to sleep.


Yes ime possesed.


I will rob you .

cheat steal and lie.

As this decaying so called body is addicted .

Addicted to anything it enjoys.

Not caring for who or what it hurts to get his inner childs gratification.

Slowly but surely killing ones self ,

The mind with its denial, the body beaten ruined, souless.

25 YEARS OF PAINE THAT WONT LEAVE ME ALONE,

I wish and think the only way to stop this monster inside of me is to kill it.

Which leads to my death.

Because the addict wont go with out me.

Clinging with the grip of a bear.

The monkey on my back.

i wake to a slap.

A slap of reality.

But what is reality because i think we all live in a world of denial.

Sorrry i will have to finish .







TO BE CONTINUED.
.

shite life

Its a shity life
.
falling out the bed and wishing it was all over.

shity life a shity life.

up out of bed at ten to three.
thinking this towns got it in for me.
straight to the bottle.

straight to the nick.
on my way to a bottemless pit

Caged like an ape.
 No plate of grapes for me

A shity life ,a shity life.

Oh what fun we had.
in our minds its great, fucking brilliant life.

Its a brilliant life, a brilliant life.
When men shag your wife then shake your hand.

Make & play.

PLAY out of the question.

Get up 5-30 am.
work my nuts off, for some shmuck .

Day in night out .
shout shout fucking shout.

We live for what,

to get viruses.
Have accidents.
misses playing away.
bills to pay.
got no money.
struggle to get a job.
watch loved ones die.
then live with it.
then well basically.
Get shite for blood.

live a couple of years in tottal fucking agony.
Praying to die.
Then ?

You either get burned to ashes.
OR stuck in a wooden box and shuved six foot under.

Thats life .
Maggots eating away.

Thats life.
rot and decay

Thats life thats what they always say

bla bla blah

There was once a loon.
with an egg and a spoon.
thought he was in the race


But ended up in outer space.
he traveled egg & spoon to hand.

And Landed on the moon.

he fancied a bit of muff.
and ended up with beery buff.

His name was harry huggins.
Who was always up for a mugging.

people thought what a plonker.

He turns and says "fuck off back to your willy wonker".

They kept at it "you prat".
What was that kit-kat.
paper hat.
Tin hat .
Top hat.
Trilby hat ?

Ok" your a proper prick".

you sure as ime no hampton wick.

Or was it kiss me quick .
Ah i see now you just want a sweet kiss

GOD

GOD.
Great out doors.

wondering aimlessly through rusthall common.

pissing hard with raine.

Enough to put the fire of hell out.

I sit on a bench under a tree.
And what beauty i see ?.

I am still under the tree.

soaked and pissed off at myself for drinking againe.
Just came out of detox to pick another one up.

I sit feeling sorry for myself.

Get up moore your bigger than this.

HU i wish.
LEAVE ME ALONE.

all i want is to sit here in the hard raine.

That i shall do.

Through the trees i catch something from the corner of my eye.

PROBABLY some loonitic just escaped section.

No it was 3 deers.

i keep as cool as i can be as i want to get to this beaty .
touch it feel it look it in the eye.

I start walking ime at the corner.
Feel like a peeping tom.

got to get these beatys on my phones camera.

I get as close as one can .

Fuck just as i was taking the pic they fled.
It was like watching bamby on the screen.

these deeers bouncing enjoying there own little world.

Off they go darting through the woodlands.

STRANGE i dont care about the raine i dont worry that ive relapsed.

I just keep thinking at what beaty i just saw.

You see to me god is the great out doors.

when ever ime with nature i feel as one like we have a bond. i feel safe and tranquil
Just like the day i saw three deers.
God bless

Russia

TO al the russion,germans,usa,and uk.
Thanks ever so much for viewing my poetry blog, please feel free to joine.
Thanks once againe.
kind regards.
k.moore

Thank you and please feel free

Thank you for the comments recieved, please feel free to leave more comments,and if possible joine my blog.
Please dont worry about leaving your true thoughts and or feelings about my writings.
As i wont be affended.
So read and i hope every one enjoys what is reality put into words.
Feal free.
As on this blog there are no bars held.
Tottaly freedom of speach.
kind regards.
k.moore

The mother of all mothers & fathers

I would like to share what a wonderful women my mother is.
Most mothers off on there toes.
But mine stuck
with me through thick & thin.

The sins.
Of a child born by satan himself.

Mum please dont open the door .
The police are there.

waitng in anticipation.
To arrest me.

You hold your patience police man.

as you have to get past my mum first..

most of the time it never happend.
as my mum thought i cant let them take my boy away.

Fuck me it would break her heart, of which is hard to break.

THE life my mum has had to live is enough to make a so called hardend man weep.

I will be honest my child was taken from me because of my behaviour.
WHO comes to my rescue MUM..

Xmas 2009 lois my daughter is living with my mum,
An argument starts, i here from the living room .
mum crying.
i walk down the hall to mums bedroom.
tap the door.
"MUM ARE YOU OK".
Kenny i have something to tell you, but please dont go off the rails.
Mum was thinking i would go do something stupid.
which crossed my mind.
I will use this as an excuse to go get smashed.

Then my mum still sobbing.
LETS ME KNOW SHE HAS ?.

I imediatly think of when my mum gave everything up as i was wanted in the uk.
gave her house,evreything up and moved to ireland,
ime only in the country 3 months before being remanded for armed robbery.

Mum says "kenny please go back to england, what with your english accent you will be killed in there, THE JOY(MOUNT JOY PRISON)
I have a huge irish family.
NO worries getting bail out money together, so i fuck off back to england
get arrested in wales, taken to chatham in kent and remanded to elmley prison.

Mums straight over back to england to visit me make sure her boy is ok.

 I COP, 17 MONTHS FOR TWO SHOP BURGLERYS.

In the mean time mum is moving back to england.
To be with her precious son.

Mum comes back to nothing.
Just a pile of shite left all round ireland, plus england.
MOTHER IS staying with a friend .

Shortly mum gets rehoused.
TIME CAPSULE BACK TOO 2009 xmas, kenny i have BREAST CANCER,
I go numb and dumbfounded cant think of what to say to comfert her.
Mums bringing lois up with cancer.
All mums hair falls out,nailes and all, vomiting,
She wears a bandana to cover the baldness.

And whilst out ,trips and shatters her arm.
I visit mother in hospital, she has scaffolding around and holding her arm together.
Not one murma not one moan.

For my mother is a soldier.

Fuck she is so strong.
And i have no doughts to where i get my strength from .

MY MOTHER ANNE MOORE.

TO BE CONTINUED.

The Filthy Man

I dont like to wash.

The soap has a stench
Of which makes me feel foul.

The shower , the bath, sink & all.

Imay aswell be swimming in pig shit foul.

I hear peoplesay very to often ,i stink.

A cleaning is due againe.
A gun holds him down.

They bring out the hose pipe.

Full of bleach.

It burns to the bone & makes him rech and vomit.
Vomit all over him.

A ceaning is due once againe.

And the poor minging man.
Does all he can to avoid his wash.

With a push and a shuv .

Hes off to his humble abowd

Which is full of beutiful white doves.

He sees his chance.
But no one sees him.
What ever happend to the stinky old man

TWO IGNORANT RUSSION WOMEN

I climb the stairs
of the double decker bus.
only to hear this
russion say

"hes a junky or alcoholic."

I pause
&
gather my thoughts.
then

I explode.

What did you just say.
nothing (shes in denial now")

If youve got something to say,
say it to my face,
fucking cheek.

i put my ipod back on chilling,
beer in hand,
listening to the

Smiths and Chillies.

I sit,

Chilling..
 but cant let this go

WHERE?

you from
she ignors
me.

Russia i say,
she nods her head

"yes"

Well when your in england  darling!
have some fucking respect.

Tuting
to herself.

AND IF YOU DONT LIKE  IT THEN
FUCK OFF BACK TO RUSSIA.
WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU ARE, YOU HORRIBLE UGLY LOOKING
C  U NEXT TUESDAY
I get up to leave its my stop


C U Next Tuesday!!

I Think 2 myself,

Im not a rascist
but right now
I am angry!!!

And dissiopointed at this so called ladys attitude &
prejudice

the lenght of silvie

utopia247
You thought you was so clever.
you brought yet you stole forever.
you steal for what.
 To buy your daghters love.
for what cannot be brought.
The only thing you tried to buy didnt happen.
what came from it was you stole againe.
you stole your daughters innosence, and planted devistating seeds of darkness in loises beutiful, pure, and innosent head.
enough has been said

Sleeping 12hours aday

There was once a time.
when all i could do is play.

Now those days are long & gone.
And the time to play seems so so far away.

I wish as do most of us do that i or we
could unlock the clock.
And tic tok that fucking clock.
To bring us back to where we was at.(happy times)

But time isnt on myside anymore, not even by myside.
its pushing me down and all around.

I feel so dizzy.
but elated.

as time if you take the positive form the neg.
wont break a leg.

you can manipulate time just like you manipulate everything.

your boss, people on the street, your family, any one or anything can be manipulated.

you see time cant be manipulated, we can imagine trying to but no it wont happen.

my point is.enjoy the time you have because youl never know when time not GOD will reach for you.
And thats when your time is up.

up to where heaven ?

A Song 4 Medway

All along the medway
As poetry says.

All kinds of things good and evil dwell alongside the medway.

Not too much to be seen of the good
But from my knowledge most evil.

I walk from one end of the med to the other

Only to discover
the evil

Playing at its best.
so many friends

have been
and gone
to my despair

and all along the med in the old days they called it

desperadoe.

The medway caught me when i was
weak and people
of the med

offerd me weed and a quick fix
ime feeling fine
but then the medway introduced me to the fine art of poppy seed waste a bitter
but beautiful taste

which made a waste
of everything beautiful in my life

what a strife
As everything by the med was cute,

We was in our glory only to end up gory.

glory gory medway.

or was it medway or the loonatics it accomodates,
boasting,
fighting
frightend soul
but we still went on and
fought & fought

and shit on each other,
lied cheated,
stole, stole
and snatched
the soul of a person
if
off gaurd,

Beauty can bring the man out of the Child...

It was ten to three
on the 07/6/04,

i hear from a hospital ward a baby crying
of which brings tears to my eyes

we already have something in common a bond
A bond that i have to
stand,
cherish
nurture.

Before my special little girl
was born i was what you would call

A TEARAWAY.I THOUGHT I KNEW BEST.

Was untouchable sometimes i thought i was invisible & didn't give a flying fuck
 fuck you,  fuck the world
fucked myself,

the plates the screws more broken bones than a 7 stone body  being tossed, flung about.

The car.

Which is now spinning on its roof top.

Just as the few ton jugganort.

Collides.

Hitting the car straight into the dashboard.

The arctic seemed to go through the car .

As does a hot knife through butter.

i so so wanted negative energy wrapped around me

The prisons,
hospitals,
violence,
basically insanity near on its worst,
but that wasnt enough i wanted more,
prison lock me up for good was my attitude
fuck the law

who are they
PUBLIC SERVENTS fuck em

I had no rock bottom as some would call it,
ROCK BOTTOM,

well let me tell you my friend
there was no bottom i just kept falling over & over again
,i will let you my friend who ever you are
,little by little
know the secrets
that have haunted
me for more than 25 years,

IT WAS MY SPECIAL LITTLE GIRL

LOIS

THAT MADE ME SEE THE BEAUTY

THAT LIFE HAS TO OFFER